I have more diagnosed medical conditions than I can count on two hands. A handful of them have symptoms that I deal with on a daily basis: Asthma, G.E.R.D/Hiatus Hernia/Schiatzki’s Ring, HFI (I will go into further details on a future post), endometriosis and fibromyalgia. This week though, I experienced the worse Fibromyalgia flare-up to date. It’s one of those scenarios where when I didn’t think it could get any worse, it proved me wrong.
Many of you have probably had one of those brutal flus that knock you out for the count for the better part of week (at least); you know the one where your whole body aches so much and you’re nauseous, feverish and weak. A fibro flare-up, at least for me, has that kind of pain. A deep in your bones, furious pain that is generally resistant against pain remedies. This current flare-up is so fierce I had burning, tingling pain from the tips of my fingers, shoulders, along my back, into my hips and down to the balls of my feet. Even the action of carrying a mug of tea across the room was painful. There were a couple evenings when the pain seemed to burrow deep into my hands and forearms, and using them for any movements inflicted lasting, gnawing pain.
Of course, with the flu, rest is needed and sleep is <for the most part> easier to come by because of the fatigue. With fibromyalgia, no matter how extremely fatigued I feel, despite feeling as though I could sleep for days, it’s next to impossible. This is mainly because it’s the evening and late hours of the night when the symptoms amplify. It takes me hours to fall asleep on evenings where my symptoms are subdued. During a flare-up? I’m likely to start dozing off when the sun starts to rise. Quite the vicious cycle because really, how am I to have the energy to tackle chores, jobs…life, if I am walking around half dazed?
Not only is the lack of sleep to blame here but also the treacherous Fibro Fog that takes ‘Dazed and Confused’ to a whole new level. Completely unfocused, forgetful, disinterested…blank. The fog combined with the fatigue is enough to diminish my creative flow or simply that zest, and leaves me feeling as though I’m simply going through the motions instead of having the energy and drive to accomplish all I hope to each day, week and month.
Of course there’s also the fever and sensory sensitivity, neither of which are any kind of fun.
As you can imagine, with the pain, fatigue and the fog – a serious triple threat: Fibromyalgia affects every aspect of my life. Work: most days I manage to do what it takes to get through hour by hour, shift by shift, day by day. Many Fibro suffers can no longer work; I am fortunate to still have a job and am grateful that my job is not physically strenuous. As it stands, this current flare up has me worried as it’s the first one that has caused me to miss a few days of work. Naturally, I am concerned. Are things progressing/worsening with my Fibromyalgia symptoms? If so, what then?
I can’t worry about what may happen in the future. All I can do is take each day as it comes and do the best I can. As many of us face our own daily battles, I leave you with this S.C. Lourie quote: Sometimes, just getting up and facing another day is courage enough.
Be well, friends. Gentle Fibro Hugs to all of you.